The way you talk about yourself is very powerful. Whether or not you are conscious of it, the way you tell stories of your life frames how people see you, and how you see yourself.
The link is to an article intended to help professionals deal with being fired, but this excerpt is truly profound.
Prior to the past five years or so, I had a very different life story. The main characters, the plot, the overall theme of my life when I described it to both myself and the people around me. I was invested in that identity, created by the story I had given myself, and perpetuated by the telling of that story to others.
At some point along the way, I decided to let go of certain roles, forgive certain things without apologies, and re-distribute the focus of my story until it was about the woman I am now, and it wasn’t until I changed the telling of my story that I became someone different… the confident, competent, stable person I am today. My weight loss in the past year wouldn’t have been possible for the person I was inside different storyline.
So, what about you? What is the story you tell yourself (and others) about who you are? What are the stories that everyone knows about you, and are those the stories you want people to think of when they see you? Are you a victim? Are you a hero? Are you a child or an adult? Are you the main character or a passive bystander in your own life story?
Make sure you’re telling the story you want to be telling, not the story that gives you short-lived comfort at the expense of both your own self image and the respect you deserve from others.